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One of the hallmarks of maturity is the ability to live amicably with others in a manner which is cognizant of our station in life. For all practical purposes this means "acting one's age" as opposed to thinking, doing and feeling in ways that might be appropriate for our children. But what does all of this really mean? That is, how does it translate into a step by step script for playing out the part of one who is getting older?

For most people, graceful aging is living in a manner which is worthy of respect. Doing so, one is thought  of as being a real person. Typically, this supposes declines in energy level, the accumulation of weight or inches around the waistline along with loss of skin and muscle tone. while still doing something somewhat socially worthwhile, or at least quietly innocuous. This is what it means to be a respectable senior citizen

People over fifty, in some cases forty, are advised to prepare for these changes and expectations in order that they may "go with the flow"-something which is often deflating in relation to the more robust, more intensely responsible states of a younger years. This is generally referred to as "accepting one's mortality," namely the fact that he or she will not last forever. That means acknowledging the inevitability of death, an idea which may have been only intellectually plausible prior to this point. The question then is "What  causes it to become a pressing concern at this particular point in time?"

The answer is different for everyone. But there are a few categories. One is chronological age in relation to standard durations of life expectancy. That means realizing that one is getting older upon turning fifty, given the average life expectancy is eighty-five, Another benchmark is the death age of the parent of the same sex. After one reaches this age, one may feel guilty about living longer, so some psychologists think. Yet another may be somewhat the same as an ancient rite of passage. This could be the date of voluntary retirement from a career. Still one more could be seeing the face of a first great grand child. In Hindu literature this was seeing the face of one's first grandchild, but people are living much longer nowadays. Surely there are events other than these as well.

When one encounters any of these milestones, one is expected to be focused, indeed to contemplate, on getting older. This is another way of saying that one is expected to ardently "Start growing old gracefully." In our culture, this generally means anything from "Letting go and letting God" to "Accepting the things which cannot be changed." Both of these have a religious tone to be sure, but they have secular equivalents. These include "Accepting one's mortality" or just being "Real Enough to know that none of us will  live forever." How can any of these phrases be bad in the least?

Perhaps these phrases are all good, but maybe not. Is there not a nuance or two here that need to be examined? What does ardently accepting the fact that death is inevitable really mean?

Perhaps it really means acknowledging that today's strength and ability to enjoy will little by little be replaced by memory loss, diminished physical ability, and and susceptibility to disease to say nothing of declining interest in others. And, that one should never cover these up with such procedures as GH injections, botox therapy, plastic surgery or anything other that might escalate flagging vitality. Such is thought to be something only for only the rich and famous or poorer folks in throes of an identity crisis.

Of the many articles on graceful-aging which can be found on the internet, almost all have to do with human relationships, religiosity, pets, self-acceptance, and trying to make the most of each day because it is more intensely precious.With all of these, there can be no quarrel. They are all part of being human (at any age,really.) But where is at least the walking around the mall that only the Nike-wearing seniors are supposed to be so good at? Where is grandmother who swims a mile each day? And where is the admonishment to reduce the calorie intake, as tests on animals irrefutably demonstrate that this, above all other things, extends life span? And where is the mention of supplements to augment energy and vitality to say nothing of escalating muscle and skin tone? Then too, where is the awareness that mortality is not dependent only upon advanced years? That is, where is the thought that any of us can die tomorrow in a car crash or some similar catastrophe? Why is this concentration on inevitable demise just a thing of over-fifty nowadays?

The peerless Jack Lalane]ne devoted eighty-five of his ninety-six years to the cause of fitness. In fact, many would say that the word "fitness" exists because of his efforts. He invested a lifetime  telling people that diet, supplements and exercise along with his famous vegetable juicer made life more worth living. When asked if he had realized that he was going to die, he said "It would be counter to my image to do so." By this, most people thought that he was denying mortality. But really, were he here today, he might say that he was only saying that he was concentrating on life as opposed to focusing on death.

Jack Lalanne at ninety-six was lecturing, selling people on his his juicer, promoting his new book "Forever Young,"  taking forty to fifty supplements per day and working out like a former Mr America for two hours every morning. In addition, he was being a devoted husband and CEO of his corporation. Where is the let go and let God in all of this? Where is the acceptance of the inevitable deterioration of his overall healthiness? Where is the loss of interest in others?

Perhaps our country needs him as a new senior role model.Maybe the image of the happy couple retiring to Arizona or Florida needs to go the way of the Model-T Ford. Maybe, too, our Christian country needs a new set of Bible verses to guide us in the aging process.  For instance, what would be so problematic about "Lifting one's eyes unto the hills from whence comes our help" (while walking through those hills, of course?) Or, what is so wrong with the stories about Sarah and Abraham, parenting a nation when chronologically too old parent a family? Perhaps such sagas are too fanciful for modern day thinkers? But Lalanne was a real senior citizen and he was anything but passive. Furthermore, most would say he was anything but realistic in our thought-world of statistics and probabilities.

Sadly, Jack did not live to one hundred sixty. Some thought he would, perhaps himself included. But he did die suddenly and with all of his faculties not only intact but vastly superior to most of ours today. Is that not something which all of us might think superior to wasting away in a nursing home bed?

For further thought on fitness and longevity order my book "Think and Grow Fit."